fictionsmith

Yesterday evening Sarah and I were recruited to be undercover agents for a project one might call a ‘social experiment.’

• The Place: Fido
• The Target: Danny
• The Title: Operation “Danny Appreciation Day”
• The Employer: Well, we’d be poor spies if we divulged that info, wouldn’t we?  Besides, we already burned the computer we got the email on and are realizing that deletion was the more intelligent option…

We were given a code to get into a car in a parking lot out back of the location, and extracted some helium balloons with an envelope with our names on it that contained instructions and resources for the mission, as well as a Flip video camera to document our exploits for our Employer.

Sarah and I entered the restaurant and split at the door as I went to procure us a table in the far back while she (discreetly as possible) brought the helium balloons and card to the front and asked for Danny as she ordered our dinner.

Since the briefing excluded any sort of imagery of our target, Sarah wasn’t sure what Danny looked like and had to play the fine line of offering a gift of appreciation mixed with not tipping her hand that she had no clue who this man was.

• She performed admirably.
• Danny was confused (rightly so).
• Danny promptly contacted his wife to explain that he had no clue who the woman that gave him a gift was (wise man).
• It was time to eat.

I had a delightful chicken salad and Sarah ordered a sandwich containing apple slices and cheese… Riveting details to be certain.

Retreating to the table I had procured , we were fortunate that Danny hadn’t gone exploring to further question her, and we quickly ate and it was then my turn.

I went to the car, entered the code (sorry, but since this IS a spy-related tale, I must include details that at least SOUND like they belong even if they are a touch mundane), extracted a box with cake in it, and had a sudden realization…

I had no cash on me!  A simple swipe of my credit card would give Danny my name, and thus something to google! 

Since I don’t particularly try to hide myself online, finding me and thus a facebook linking to our employers would spoil the whole thing (at this point I realized my online conduct is not conducive to being a full-time spy…)!  I had to sneak past him to get back to Sarah to procure some cash and I was on my way.

My cover: I was buying 2 cookies.

I bought the cookies (spoiler alert: they were delicious), and told Danny that the box was for him.  The conversation was as follows:

Ryan: Hey, can I get these two cookies?
Danny: Sure.
Ryan: Danny?
Danny: Yeah.
Ryan: This is also for you (sliding the box across the counter).
Danny: …all right…
Ryan: For Danny Appreciation Day.
Danny: What is this?  What’s going on?
Ryan: I don’t know… I’m just the messenger…
Danny: You have to tell me.
Ryan: Hmmm… nope.  I would like to get the two cookies though, if that’s ok…
2nd Employee: *Enters* What the hell is going on?  Dan? (to me) This from you?
Danny: He’s “The Messenger.”
Ryan: I’m the messenger.
Danny: $5.46.
2nd: What the hell? (spotting the Flip cam) Oh-ho-ho-ok. That’s what’s going on.  Next time, give the darker person something too…
Danny: I want front row tickets.
Ryan: Happy Danny Appreciation Day!

I was in the clear from there.  The mission would continue on with other agents, but Sarah and I enjoyed our sweet rewards and toodled sped on home (do spies toodle?)

It was fun to be spies for an evening… reminded me of Chuck, a rather awesome TV show that we will be watching on NBC tonight (sorry, have to plug that show… every season it almost gets cancelled…)

vcD,
-R