fictionsmith

(Author’s note:  This is a long and very unbelievable story… but I assure you every word is true even though if it were in a movie, I would roll my eyes and say it was ‘horribly contrived writing’ and that events like this would never happen in the real world… please read until the finish if you wouldn’t mind…)

Gather ‘round all, it’s story time… and for this tale, we have “The Wandering Factotum” actually wandering, lost in a dangerous place, separated from his love who was also lost in another (if not moreso) dangerous place.

Let’s jump back a moment and give a little backdrop before we delve into the meat of the tale…

Some of the greyscale crew and myself went to Chicago this past weekend to film a single city-skyline shot to place in the movie (and eat deep-dish pizza & have fun, but that is neither here nor there).  We arrived Friday afternoon and were leaving promptly on Sunday morning.  There were so many activities that I could talk about, but I’ll limit the story to just what happened.

After we had completed the shot around 6:30pm, my Assistant Director (Gloria) and I dropped the rest of our crew back to the hotel and embarked on a mission to get to Chicago’s Museum of Science and Industry by 8pm to meet up with my lovely wife and Gloria’s sister, Fred (…yes, it’s a nickname).  The event was the last showing of the Harry Potter exhibit filled with actual props from the 6 movies.

Sarah and Fred were coming from another part of town since they weren’t involved in the filming.  They took a several trains to get to the exhibit… but I’ll get to that in a moment.

Gloria and I booked it to the train station, got on the correct train, hopped off to get on the subway, found another train, and then promptly exited what we believed was to be a mere 3 blocks away from the museum.

(hold on, did I say 3 blocks?  I meant over 2 miles)

The iPhone is a beautiful thing when you are lost… it can show you where you are, where you need to go, but it fails in regards to keeping you safe in South Chicago when the sun was dipping down in the horizon and you have a 45 minute walk ahead of you (according to google maps…).

Gloria and I stuck out like sore thumbs to say the least.

Wait! Update on Sarah & Fred: They’ve gotten off the train in lieu of securing a taxi to get them to the museum (author note: It was about 8:30 at this time and we had already missed half of our scheduled time at the exhibit).  Sarah’s phone had died, and they were having a horrible time finding any sort of taxi… in the meanwhile, they were both receiving cat-calls and unwanted advances from uncouth individuals and groups on street corners…

Great Gatsby things were looking dim. Some muttered prayers and joking around about the sheer ridiculousness of the predicament we were in was enough to keep spirits high alive between Glo and I, but Sarah & Fred’s plight had me very concerned.  I slung my camera under my jacket a la Leonard from Memento and we soldiered on, jogging past streets and keeping a brisk pace along the sidewalk.

Time was running out to see even a few moments of the exhibit…

Suddenly… (as all good tales are wont to have a moment like this), in rolls a white stretch hummer, and a teenager with shaggy hair in a tuxedo sticks his head out and calls to Gloria and myself.  He sports a big smile and is evidently getting a kick at seeing us so far out of our element.

Teen: Hey!  You guys need a ride?
Gloria: …where are you going?
Teen: (disappears back into cab and shortly reappears) The… the Museum of Science and Industry?
Ryan: (exchanging an incredulous look with Gloria as if he were in on some joke in some strange way) …That’s exactly where we’re going.
Gloria: Oh praise Jesus!
Teen: C’mon in!

So we hop in the white stretch limo hummer and find ourselves in the midst of some very hospitable high schoolers dressed in tuxedos and prom dresses.  They all find this very amusing as the two newcomers climb in the back.  They offered us water and sparkling faux-champagne…  We took the water graciously given and told them of the trek we had been on thus far in the day.  They were highly amused.  So were we.

I couldn’t help but think that if such convenience were to occur in a movie, I would roll my eyes and find it to be shoddy writing… or at least think myself in a movie like Dumb & Dumber.

But I believe that God enjoys a good comedy snatched from the maw of potential tragedy.

We get the teen’s name (John) and intend to find him on Facebook later, and arrive at the exhibit, still very late, but at least with a shot to see about 20 minutes of the exhibit.

Gloria: We can’t go in without Sarah and Fred.
Ryan: *sigh* I know.

So after all of that adventure and kindness via stretch hummer, we set off in hopes of finding a taxi that would take us to Sarah & Fred to pick them up and just take us back to our hotel.

But lo! We get a call from Fred’s cell that they had finally found a taxi!  And they were en route!  Glo and I run back to the museum just in time to see our counterparts exiting their taxi, hugs to ease frazzled nerves are exchanged, and we make a dash to find the entrance to the exhibit…

We make it to security, who give us the puzzled looks saying “You do realize the exhibit closes in 10 minutes and you’re just now getting here?” They gave us directions to the exhibit but with little hope of being able to partake.

The four of us find our way to some adults dressed as wizards that all sported British accents… we recount the terrors of the journey and they ask us where we’re from.  “Tulsa, Oklahoma” seemed like a suitably far enough distance to evoke some sympathy.  One of them departs for a moment to go get their manager.

About five minutes pass and their manager comes out with a sympathetic smile… the kind that you know is about to deliver the sad news that they had just shut down for the evening.

He took our tickets.

“They told me about what happened to you all.  A bit flustered, yes?” He said in his British accent.  “Well, what we’ll do is give you your very own private tour, although I’m afraid to say it will have to be a quick one… will that be all right?”

We all nodded emphatically and offered our thanks for his kindness.

“You’re really going to enjoy this… All the way from Oklahoma…” he seemed to mutter in amusement to himself.

And off we went through the experience.  It started with the Roundtree sisters going through the sorting hat and off we were to Hogwarts where a man in a robe with a lantern called all of us ‘first years’ to deboard the “Hogwarts Express” and follow him to Hogwarts.

Inside we were reunited with the manager who introduced us to our kind tour guide who had agreed to stay as late as we needed to run through the exhibit.  We understood the toll this was taking and made sure not to linger at any point…

We saw just about every important prop and outfit from all 6 movies (including the one that will be released this summer), and they weren’t just replicas… they were the props the actual actors used…

I’ll let Sarah regale you in her blog with what all was in the exhibit (and there was understandably no photography so I can’t share any of the images with you), but we went through the experience, sitting in Hagrid’s chair, pulling up baby Mandrakes, seeing buckbeak, Dobby, Kreature, and the wands used and costumes worn by all our favorite characters.

We left incredibly satisfied, and even heard the tour guide say in hushed tones to another tour guide that was waiting around, “That was fun… running through the exhibit like that.” I was pleased.

After suitable gift shop purchases (I picked up some special items for Sarah who had successfully survived being sexually harassed repeatedly), we headed out to the Navy Pier to meet up with our two remaining crew members to eat at Bubba Gump’s and share stories… but that was after the drunk man at the train station regaled us with Pearl Jam’s “Black” a-capella in a fairly off key and horribly awkward singing spectacle… and then wanted us to judge him a la American Idol… Then he told us everything he had drank that night in mostly incoherent sentences…

…all in all… I’m still mildly skeptical it all happened myself

-R