.:Uncomfortable
I (unfortunately) (unfortunately) value comfort too much. In an airsoft battle, I buy an expensive gun and hang back and provide cover-fire to avoid being lit up with pain (read: discomfort).
In a situation that gets out of hand socially, I freeze. Deer in the headlights of uncomfortableness (there has to be a better/shorter word to describe it).
When things get too busy and I’m inundated by tasks and people to keep happy via timely correspondance and effective time management, I also tend to freeze. Perhaps I need triage training?
It’s not something I do instinctively, but more that it happens when I forget to get back to someone not out of actively ignoring them, but moreso because something slipped through the cracks.
And then? Well, it becomes the delicate line between letting something go on and on because it’s already been going on an on (and thus making it worse), or facing the uncomfortable reality of having to play mea culpa for having not acccomplished what I needed to for so long.
Ah, discomfort, how I try to keep you at bay with wrappings of blankets and bubble packaging…
…but you’re the thing that makes me the better person… the person that has to ‘man up’ and get things done… the person that takes initiative and could someday do something great if not for fear of getting cut, bruised, or shot…
Today has been a day of honesty… of openness. So, why am I spending a bit of time to write about this when I have a laundry list of things yet to mark off? Because it’s uncomfortable.
Because the guy with the smug look in the picture needs public accountability, and the sooner I get the untested tested and the unproven to take the hard road, I’ll be better for it… and I think I owe it to my friends and colleages to stop taking forever to respond to their e-mails, calls, texts, and facebook messages… with exponentially increasing time depending on how much effort and discomfort responding takes.
Now if only I could stop having the same dream where I’m afraid to get out of my WWII foxhole and get up on the battlefield (hence my foray into airsoft… can’t let that dream become reality… courage needs exercising too)
-R
